


my gravity always leans towards you

by letfelicitysoar



Category: VIXX
Genre: Angst, F/F, M/M, OT6, hyuken, wontaek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-08
Updated: 2014-12-08
Packaged: 2018-02-28 15:57:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2738360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letfelicitysoar/pseuds/letfelicitysoar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>when sanghyuk vanishes, no one knows where he's gone to, not even jaehwan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	my gravity always leans towards you

something isn’t right. obviously something isn’t  _always_ right, but when taekwoon walks into the room, he only sees four of them there and that shouldn’t be correct. there should be five, not four, he doesn’t even have to properly count, he already knows that one body is missing, that one of them is not with the rest of them and he hates himself for days for not realizing it right away but the answer first comes to him when a bead of sweat runs down hakyeon’s forehead and hes asking in a frenzy, “where is hyuk, where is hyuk, where the  _hell is sanghyuk?_ ”

“we don’t know,” wonsik says, his face dropped more and more as every goddamn minute passes, as every day and month goes on that they’ve been living in this forest, their resolve to find shelter elsewhere gone long before any of them could ever remember there being one.

“what do you mean you don’t know!?” hakyeon practically screams and taekwoon hasn’t heard him get that angry in a long time, not since jaehwan had accidentally tossed their supplies down the river and  _shit, jaehwan_.

he scans the room and finds jaehwan sitting in the corner, back pressed hard against the plaster and his eyes shut, screwed tight where his face is contorted into something much more deeper and lasting than pain. taekwoon wants to reach out to him, he wants to hug him and reassure him that everything is fine, but he knows that’s too much, that ever since the war, nothing has been  _fine_.

“hyung, calm down,” hongbin says and he reaches for hakyeon’s shoulder but gets a slap to his hand instead.

“what happened? where is sanghyuk? why isn’t he here right now? jaehwan, didn’t you two go out together!?” hakyeon turns so fast to look at jaehwan that his whole body shakes with the force of it.

“i-” jaehwan starts and that’s when taekwoon notices how pale he is, how limp and pulled out his body looks.

the shock fades and taekwoon starts to feel angry too, but he  _can’t_. not right now. not when jaehwan is so  _torn_  at losing sanghyuk. there isn’t time to play the blame game.

“i don’t know  _why_ …” jaehwan says, his voice trembling. “we went to gather the firewood, like usual and then… he was gone.”

and the knowledge that hits both taekwoon and hakyeon is much too strong, too bitter and horrific to recall that  _people do not just disappear… but here in the woods they do_. he remembers what had happened to the female couple that passed by, the one with the really silly girl who was hakyeon’s age and who made sanghyuk giggle and made jaehwan childishly jealous. they had stayed the night, but by morning they were gone. all their things remained but the two had simply vanished into the morning mist.

then the boy who had been searching for his father. taekwoon had remembered that one a little more vividly, the father and son duo had lived deeper in the woods, sometimes he would pass by them whenever they were going to the lake for water. at first, they had thought the boy was lying to them, but sanghyuk had trusted him, it was sanghyuk that won taekwoon over to go declare that they search. but it was fruitless, the boy’s father hadn’t taken a single thing with him, so he couldn’t have just abandoned his son. before the sun had set that day, the boy too was gone.

“you’re kidding, right? please tell me this is some jo-”

“hyung,” hongbin says sternly, a serious look in his eyes. “jaehwan would  _not_ joke about this.”

“h-he just… gone, right in front of me…” jaehwan croaks and his eyes glass over as he recalls the moment.

wonsik frowns and taekwoon can see how tired the other is, how worn down wonsik is becoming and something in taekwoon’s heart breaks for umpth time. wonsik mumbles out, “it isn’t your fault, hyung.”

to that, jaehwan doesn’t respond and just buries his head in his knees. hakyeon takes a seat on someone’s bed and tries to level his breathing while hongbin goes over to wrap an arm around jaehwan’s shoulder.

taekwoon counts to ten and prays sanghyuk reappears.

—-

“okay, hyung, we can be the team that collects firewood!”

jaehwan laughs at that.

when he had suggested they all split into teams to do the different tasks to keep them all alive, he hadn’t particularly expected any of them to immediately volunteer to partner up with him, especially fourteen year old han sanghyuk, the boy who lost both parents and has been glued to taekwoon and hakyeon like they were easily made replacements.

“you sure about that, kid?” wonsik asks and then quickly adds on, “i mean, jaehwan hyung talks  _a lot_.”

“hey!” yells jaehwan, but he isn’t really offended. the other day he had gotten into a rather nasty spat with wonsik over which area of the forest they should occupy and it hadn’t been cleared up until taekwoon silently did that thing where he gives wonsik a look and he immediately clamors up.

“jaehwan hyung is funny,” sanghyuk says softly, hand clutched around hakyeon’s sleeve. “besides wonsik hyung, you’re the one who doesn’t ever shut up about rap being life.”

“that’s because it is!” wonsik yells and his face gets embarrassingly red, before he pulls on hongbin’s elbow to leave the room with him. “we’ll just be a team then!”

jaehwan looks down at sanghyuk and thinks  _wow this small fry wants to be with me?_  and something about that makes his head spin a little but sanghyuk looks so determined that jaehwan barks out another laugh and tells him that they’ll be the best firewood collectors ever.

easily enough, taekwoon and hakyeon are paired to cook and watch the little worn down cottage they had found in the old forest while the other four are assigned different jobs to do. it wasn’t until the brown bear had woken hongbin in the middle of the night that they had realized safety wasn’t a luxury they had anymore, so taekwoon and hakyeon had taken up the responsibility of being ‘guards’ as jaehwan liked to call it.

sometimes though, taekwoon would pair up with wonsik or jaehwan, sometimes sanghyuk would latch onto hongbin and sometimes hakyeon would have to force the youngest to go scouting with him.

it was simple. they had a system:  _never go anywhere alone_. even if they were going to take a piss somewhere behind a tree, they had to being a buddy along, which was terrible when sanghyuk went through puberty and his body had begun making  _changes_  and everyone made hakyeon give him  _the talk_.

“should we take this or not?” sanghyuk asks when he sees the rusted bike leaning against an overgrown tree.

“that’s a piece of junk, hyuk.” there was a chain, jaehwan figures, but it’s been broken from the overgrowth of the forest within the last twenty years and even though most of the bike is garbage, some bits still look salvageable but it isn’t worth it in jaehwan’s opinion.

“we should take it!” sanghyuk says, his grin breaking the mud caked on his face that jaehwan had so eloquently slabbed on as a playful tactic.

“pfft,” he snorts, “i am not helping you carry that.”

“whatever, then.” sanghyuk looks older now, much older than jaehwan can remember when he can only picture the twelve year old boy who had snot dried around his nose when they had once run into a group of soldiers ready to gun them down.

it’s been five years since then, since the accident, since the war, since jaehwan met sanghyuk and got his firewood collecting partner. sanghyuk’s had a growth spurt since then, he towers over everyone else and his limbs are just always all over the place, awkward teenage syndrome dooming ever muscle spasm and accidental boner.

“how do you even get those things?” jaehwan had asked one night when sanghyuk had woken him up, face and ears redder than ever.

“what does it matter, just— what do i do? i tried cold water but it didn’t work like usual.”

“what the  _hell_  do you want me to do about it?” jaehwan laughs, sitting under the midnight sky with sanghyuk, who’s crouched over in embarrassment. “seriously, you don’t know anything about girls, how do you even know what arousal is?”

“shut up, hyung,” sanghyuk groans out, squirming very uncomfortably when jaehwan hits his shoulder playfully.

so he does it again.

and again.

and  _again_.

“hyung, i swear to go-”

“oh my god,” jaehwan says and sanghyuk goes still.

after a minute of silence passes, sanghyuk says, “what?”

“nothing,” jaehwan lies and suddenly his face is red too. he doesn’t say anything more. just sits with sanghyuk all night until his hard on subsides and when it’s morning, they crash on their separate beds, backs facing each other.

sanghyuk is no longer twelve.

—-

hongbin finds himself pacing a lot recently, much more than before at least. he use to like a good work out, a jog or doing push ups with wonsik or taekwoon. right now though, all he can do is pace, walk back and forth in a straight line from his shared bed with sanghyuk to the window where wonsik usually broods about on.

the first night felt weird, it wasn’t always like that. he use to share that bed with wonsik until sanghyuk got too big to sleep in hakyeon and taekwoon’s bed. that’s when they found the old cot in the abandoned camping grounds and wonsik got his own sleeping place. that was when sanghyuk was barely sixteen and his legs and body suddenly grew too much for everyone else to keep up with. so three years,  _three years_  hongbin has shared that bed with sanghyuk and the first night without that snoring right in his ear leaves him feeling more restless than anything.

“binnie-ah,” hakyeon says and he’s much calmer, much more composed, but he isn’t exactly okay either. “stop that, please.”

he can’t hear him. he can barely process where the hell he’s going without tripping over his feet and that’s a feat all in itself considering how clumsy hongbin’s always been. he makes it back to the bed three more times before hakyeon’s pulling him down and propping his ass against the worn mattress.

“you gotta stop that,” hakyeon says, voice even but the worry lines across his forehead are more prominent than they’ve ever been.

“sorry,” hongbin apologizes half heartedly.

hakyeon pulls him in his arms, “it’ll be okay.”

“hyung, you and i both know tha-”

“we don’t know anything about that. we don’t have any knowledge on what happens when they— when they  _disappear_ , but i do know that it’ll be okay.”

and hongbin knows it’s the truth, he knows they have no idea what exactly happens or why it happens, but who the hell are they kidding? it isn’t going to be  _okay_.

he thinks about jaehwan, the look he had when he came back without sanghyuk, the sound of his voice and the lack of life in his entire body. hongbin knows that jaehwan is never going to be  _okay_.

—-

hakyeon counts to ten and sanghyuk appears before his eyes.

he almost gives the older male a heart attack and hakyeon’s always been so feeble about these types of things, especially when it comes to an energetic sanghyuk.

“hakyeon hyung, you’re always fun to play with.” sanghyuk giggles and swings his tiny arms around taekwoon’s shoulders.

“i don’t like this game,” hakyeon admits and he pinches sanghyuk’s cheek. “i don’t get why you and taekwoon enjoy it so much.”

“it’s fun,” sanghyuk says and jumps around on taekwoon’s back, “right, hyung?”

“yeah,” taekwoon says, a small smile forming on his lips.

ever since they found little han sanghyuk in the old dumpster outside of town, taekwoon had taken the poor thing under his wing, always carrying and protecting him, fawning over sanghyuk as if he was his own child.

(hakyeon thinks it’s ridiculous because taekwoon is barely seventeen, how can he already want a kid?)

jaehwan had gotten jealous easily (he was the second one they found after wonsik) and he had squawked that even with sanghyuk around, he would remain the eternal cute one. hongbin had taken an instant liking to sanghyuk, much to taekwoon’s dismay, but of course taekwoon would solely want to keep sanghyuk his, to have his little  _baby_  all to himself.

“let’s play again, okay hakyeon hyung? we’ll go hide and you count to ten. whoever finds the other first wins!”

“i know, i know,” hakyeon says and he can’t help but smile at sanghyuk.

hakyeon turns and runs off in the opposite, counting to ten.

—-

what wonsik refuses to understand is, how the  _hell_  can taekwoon be so calm and composed after all that’s happened?

it’s been a week since sanghyuk vanished, since jaehwan is kept under someone’s sight at all times and since taekwoon has become their ‘leader’ in lieu of hakyeon’s usual position. hakyeon hadn’t taken the news well, of course jaehwan suffered the most from it, but hakyeon… he lost all direction and even tried to run off by himself to search for sanghyuk.

it was taekwoon who had set him back into order, who hit him across the face with a fist and who had managed to force jaehwan to eat after two days.

there’s always been something  _strong_  about taekwoon, even with his voice being so small and soft, even when he smiled at the little hatchling above their window sill when everyone else ignored it, and even when the bear had snuck into the house.

taekwoon was the one who kept everyone calm, who took hold of the situation and made the decision that they should use the last of their meat to lure the bear away. they struggled after that when protein became scarce in their diets, but months later sanghyuk was able to rig up that old bike he found to trap any wandering animals. it was wild, but sanghyuk had someone scavenged enough parts to make a simple bear trap (which caught no bears), bringing them rabbits and occasionally a small fox. wonsik was thankful then, thankful all the time for sanghyuk and everyone else he had to survive with.

“wonsik-ah, come eat.”

he looks to his side and sees taekwoon, the same, always the same.

“right,” wonsik says and he looks away, he can’t, never has and never will be able to look taekwoon in the eyes for longer than a minute.

taekwoon helps him up, grabs onto his arm and walks out with him towards the usual worn down table where they all eat at, except they haven’t been eating there since sanghyuk disappeared. it’s weird, wonsik knows, but the other five have become a family to him, have been his brothers since the bomb hit and taekwoon dug him up from underneath the rubble of his old home where the dead bodies of his family remained. but without sanghyuk, the empty seat is even more noticeable.

so they don’t eat at the table (sometimes at night, hongbin tries to slip into the cot with wonsik and wonsik doesn’t have the heart to push him away) and when wonsik slinks down to sit next to jaehwan, the other is nothing but an empty husk.

“hyung,” wonsik says and for the last two years both he and hongbin had tossed the habit of calling jaehwan  _hyung_ , but with the sudden disappearance of sanghyuk, the word found it’s way back into wonsik’s vocabulary.

there isn’t a response but jaehwan’s ears perk up a little.

“hyung, you gotta eat,” he says and jaehwan nods, tries to look up at wonsik, but his head falls back down.

there’s a lot wonsik wants to say right now, but he knows that saying things like ‘it isn’t your fault’ and ‘it’s gonna be alright’ won’t do anymore, not when the gleam in jaehwan’s eyes have been sucked into an empty void.

“wonsik,” jaehwan suddenly says and the younger male looks at him with eyes blown out.

“yeah?” wonsik questions, hoping to prod jaehwan to talk more.

“do you… believe in ghosts?”

—-

sanghyuk is always cute whenever he’s annoyed and right now, jaehwan wouldn’t want it any other way. it’s been a while since the two were paired up to go gather firewood and under the fading colors of day, it feel a little more intimate than when jaehwan does it with hongbin.

“hyung, stop that! i know it’s you!”

“no it isn’t!” jaehwan giggles and then tosses another pebble at the back of sanghyuk’s head.

the younger male turns around and his eyes are slits of annoyance as he glares at jaehwan, lips squished together in a pout. “there’s no one else here to bug me but you.”

“it could be a ghost?” jaehwan chuckles darkly, trying to be spooky but it just sounds stupid.

sanghyuk rolls his eyes, “oh  _please_.”

“what?” jaehwan laughs as sanghyuk shoves his shoulder.

“grow up, hyung.”

“always am, hyukkie, i always am.”

the last of the sunlight begins to filter away behind the tall forest trees and jaehwan thinks it’s a beautiful sight with sanghyuk glowering right in front of him. it’s been a while since the two were actually alone, hongbin volunteering to go outside with jaehwan and sanghyuk gluing himself slightly more towards wonsik. nineteen year old sanghyuk is even taller than seventeen year old sanghyuk, he’s also much more sassy and coy and he’s grown so much from the little boy jaehwan use to see taekwoon constantly coddle.

“sanghyuk,” he says and it’s so very unlike him to use his actual name.

but the other doesn’t seem bothered by it. “hm?”

“you’ll always keep growing too, won’t you?”

“that’s a dumb question,” he huffs and yet there’s something perky in his voice, “of course i will.”

“good, i like you being taller than me.”

“and why’s that?” he asks.

jaehwan leans up to peck the younger’s lips, quickly and chastely, almost as if his lips don’t even touch the other’s. sanghyuk turns as red as the leaves under their feet and jaehwan laughs when he pulls away.

“keep growing, but never lose that cute personality of your’s, hyukkie.”

—-

taekwoon use to imagine what life would be like if the war hadn’t started and bombs didn’t destroy most of civilization. he wonders what  _his_  life specifically would be like right now, seven years later and three months left until his twenty-fourth birthday. would he and hakyeon still be friends? hakyeon would have probably married that girl he liked in his acting class, _joohyun_ or something. taekwoon probably would have met a pretty girl too, someone he really liked and would learn to love, someone that would father his children and be the person he could confide in.

right now though, the closest thing he has to that is hakyeon and… wonsik.

taekwoon thinks about the first time he saw wonsik, the fourteen year old boy that ran into the house that was falling apart, chunks of rubble and wood falling down on him. he acted fast on that one (but wishes he could have been faster) and managed to save him, pull him out from underneath part of the ceiling, but wonsik had broke his leg that day. whenever taekwoon sees the younger limp —  _sees him try to hide that limp_  — his heart breaks a little more than usual.

wonsik is easy to talk to, he’s easy to tell things to and to be around. sometimes hakyeon can be  _too much_ , can have this excessive  _muchness_ about him and taekwoon has always been someone who has had limits for everything. wonsik isn’t like that, he’s never too much and is always just the right amount. he’s never put anything but relief and security on taekwoon’s shoulders.

but taekwoon has never expected something like this to happen.

“jaehwan hyung said… some strange things to me the other day.”

taekwoon nods, he looks over at wonsik, giving him his full attention.

“he asked me if i believed in ghosts and when i told him i didn’t he said… well, i don’t even know if you’ll believe me, hyung.”

taekwoon doesn’t say anything, he just raises an eyebrow.  _what did he say?_

“he told me that… he sees ghosts all the time and that so do we and then…” wonsik pauses, looks at taekwoon who only stares at him, waits for him to go on. “jaehwan hyung said that this forest is a resting place. it’s where the dead come to find, well, _rest_.”

“this forest?” taekwoon questions and finally speaks.

“yeah. but.” wonsik stops, averts his eyes and shakes his head. “ghosts aren’t real, right, hyung?”

“i don’t know,” taekwoon answers as honestly as he can. “sometimes ghosts live within us, when we can’t forget a person who’s moved on. but sometimes, maybe that supernatural thing could be real too.”

“are you sure?” wonsik asks, his brow furrowed. it makes taekwoon hug him, makes him give in to the indulgence of wrapping his body over wonsik like a blanket.

“maybe.”

“that’s not helpful,” wonsik laughs dryly but clings onto the fabric of taekwoon’s shirt. “… he said that sanghyuk is _dead_.”

—-

the day that han sanghyuk passed away, it rained. as a young teen, he found it strangely ironic that he would die on a day where it rained, _like the sky is crying for me._

it wasn’t an unusual death, his father had been gunned down in the war and his mother worked hard to protect him and his sisters, but it was futile when soldiers would raid homes and rape and torture the women to death. so when it was sanghyuk’s time to go, he went with open arms, all that he had left to live for was gone at that point.

but he regrets it, maybe he should have chosen life, maybe he still had things he could have enjoyed and lived for.

there was another boy, he remembers, older and stupider looking. sanghyuk didn’t know at the time but when he pushed the stupid boy out of the way from the falling beam, he did not expect to become _attached_. when han sanghyuk died, it rained in the city and the air smelled acrid and pungent and the boy he saved had wide puppy eyes and there was a gleam in it that sanghyuk wished he could be the cause of.

what he didn’t realize is that he literally was.

han sanghyuk meets them four days after he dies. he’s hiding in a dumpster because he’s afraid and doesn’t understand why he’s still alive.  _why he can still breathe and feel pain and touch things_. that’s when a light floods his vision and jaehwan is screaming his head off.

at first, sanghyuk doesn’t understand why until he sees the boy, the one with those  _eyes_  and then taekwoon’s shoving jaehwan aside and pulling sanghyuk into his arms.

he stays with them, he stays with them because he doesn’t know what else to do, he stays with them because jaehwan is with them. taekwoon is overbearing, but something about his doting nature reminds sanghyuk of his mother and he’d be lying if he denied ever basking in it from time to time. hakyeon can be just as extreme, but with him it’s always easier to tease and sass back at. hongbin and wonsik are like the brothers sanghyuk has always wanted, but he can’t think like that, not when he has two dead sisters that don’t get a second chance at life like he did.

but jaehwan, jaehwan is something curious to sanghyuk. he realizes easily enough that sanghyuk is  _not_  supposed to be alive and that’s because he was there when sanghyuk died two years ago.

“i saw you die,” he says so bluntly, just the two of them off into the woods to gather firewood.

“yeah,” says sanghyuk. he figures lying would get him no where.

jaehwan looks a little uncomfortable about the topic, but he was the one who initiated it so he continues it. “why are you so, uhm,  _alive_  right now?”

“i don’t know,” sanghyuk says honestly, a twig in his hand. he can feel the rough texture of it, the grime of the dirt and if he rubs his finger on it multiple times, his skin will change and begin to callous like anyone else’s.

“that’s not so informative,” jaehwan squints his eyes incredulously and sanghyuk chuckles softly.

“well, i’m only fourteen, how the heck am i supposed to know? i died and then woke up like this.”

“what about your body? didn’t it get crushed?”

“i reckon it’s probably still crushed.”

jaehwan scrunches his face up at that. “gross.”

sanghyuk chuckles again. “i can’t believe how not freaked out you are about this!”

“i could say the same to you! you’re so calm, it’s creepy.”

“i guess that just makes us a pair then,” sanghyuk grins and so does jaehwan.

“yeah, it probably does.”

if sanghyuk thinks back on it hard enough, he can probably pinpoint that as the moment in which he had decided that jaehwan was always going to be by his side, the moment in which he figured that if he should have to live, it would be for jaehwan and the others.

but when sanghyuk starts to fade, he realizes that this is not a second chance at life. it’s subtle at first, just small things like him accidentally dropping items when he so clearly is gripping tightly onto it. he’ll appear transparent if he stays in the sun too long and so sanghyuk worries that the others will know (because for all the loud mouth things jaehwan will do, he would never expose sanghyuk) and will begin to curse him as a monstrosity. so sanghyuk tries to avoid going out, tries to hide from the light and tries to be as useful as he can around the place, he figures he doesn’t have much time left.

it first dawned on him when they met the little boy and his father. the pair were not like the rest of them, in fact they resembled jaehwan and sanghyuk completely. almost instantly, sanghyuk realized the father was dead too, that he had died as well, possibly protecting the young child as sanghyuk had done for jaehwan. it struck sanghyuk as weird when the father vanished, how could he do something like that? sanghyuk himself knew how strong the pull was, how much he needed to be with jaehwan whenever he possibly could. so why would he leave the boy alone? but when he looked into the boy’s eyes, his heart sunk all the way down to his stomach.

sanghyuk figured he had time, much much more time, but when the two females (joohee and ara, he remembers;  _will never forget_ ) come by, sanghyuk discovers that it could happen whenever, that this thing —  _bond_  — is amplified and true to it’s nature in this place. he liked joohee, she reminded him of ken (and not in the sense that she was the living one while ara had once died) from the way that she’d enjoy making jokes and animal impressions. she was sweet and offered sanghyuk one of the beers she had stashed from the inner cities (“he’s only sixteen, for crying out loud!” hakyeon had scolded and the look of shock joohee gave was comical, “already sixteen without his first beer!?”) and teased him endlessly for his ears, while ara smacked her around and apologized endlessly.

but the pair had disappeared quicker than the boy and his father and what worries sanghyuk the most is that they both left _together_.

sanghyuk has figured that if he were to suddenly be called back to the dead, then jaehwan should  _not_  have to go with him. not when jaehwan has always been living correctly, been living as a human should be, with wants and desires and ammunition in his life.

if he leaves, sanghyuk thinks, then maybe jaehwan won’t have to. if sanghyuk can break this tie between them, stop whatever it is that keeps him and jaehwan so connected then maybe jaehwan doesn’t have to go anywhere.

“you’re stupid,” jaehwan says when it’s just the two of them that morning, out to gather firewood as usual.

“excuse me?” sanghyuk says, stopping in his tracks to look at the other. “have you been listening to me?”

“i have,” says jaehwan so simply put. “and you’re stupid.”

“do tell.”

“first of all, it isn’t obvious to know that you’re, well… not one-hundred percent there anymore. which is something you need to be more careful about with the others.”

sanghyuk colors slightly as his hand fazes and some branches fall to the floor. jaehwan chuckles and picks them up for him. “secondly, i go wherever you go.”

“no, you don’t understand, you’ll practically be dead too.”

sanghyuk’s huffing like he normally does whenever jaehwan is being idiotic, but the older male laughs it off, “what’s life without you?”

“now  _you’re_  the stupid one,” sanghyuk says, covering his face in embarrassment. “i can’t believe you just said that. stop trying to flirt while i’m trying to break up with you.”

“break up? we’re  _dating_?” jaehwan blinks alarmingly fast and drops all the firewood to the forest floor. “seriously, we can _not_  break up now that i am aware of our relationship.”

sanghyuk shoves him, “we are  _not_  dating and i’m trying to break this stupid hold on your life that i have. don’t you understand how dangerous this is?”

“so what?” jaehwan cocks his head at sanghyuk and takes the other’s hands into his own, bringing them closely to his chest. “ _take_  my life sanghyuk, like i said before, what’s life without you?”

“stop that,” sanghyuk says, cheeks painted over with red. “stop saying things like that.”

“but they’re true,” jaehwan laughs and kisses sanghyuk’s knuckles. “promise me that we will always stay together.”

“… i promise,” says sanghyuk and he lets the warmth spread throughout his chest as he closes his eyes and feels the soft press of jaehwan’s lips on his own.

and when he opens his eyes, he’s gone but jaehwan is still there.

**Author's Note:**

> okay, so a few things i wanna talk about if you've stuck around long enough to actually read until the end. 
> 
> \- when dying in someone else's place (fate had decided jaehwan was going to get squished under that beam), the person's 'soul' latches onto the original recipient of death's call. they form a new body, though it isn't complete and can only live so long as they are near the person who has their 'soul'. however, since jaehwan was originally fated to die, he too is technically dead, his 'soul' has been reaped but because sanghyuk's 'soul' is in him, he is living. so when sanghyuk left, jaehwan slowly begins to die, this process can be as quick as joohee and ara both leaving together or years, slowly pulling the person's body and mentality apart the longer it takes for them to depart the world of the living. 
> 
> \- the forest they stumbled upon is ~magical~ and the only reason they chose to even stay there is because of jaehwan. this forest exists for the sole purpose of calling all the 'souls' back, to bring the people who should be dead and the ones who shouldn't be to rest. they stayed there for so many years because they all got attached, instead of moving from place to place as they had been doing before. this place only reveals itself to those like sanghyuk and jaehwan, but the others can find it too because they're with the two (however if jaehwan were to die and the other four leave, they would not be able to find it again). 'souls' can be collected whenever, it doesn't matter how long they are in the forest, it will happen before they decide to leave a.k.a it happening to joohee and ara the next day because they only meant to pass through. the father had decided to take his boy and leave the place, which is what sanghyuk had decided to do as well. before he was called back, sanghyuk had decided that he and jaehwan would leave along with the others, which is why sanghyuk was suddenly whisked away. 
> 
> \- sanghyuk starting to 'fade' is a natural occurrence from being in the forest for so long, it begins to reveal his true nature. 
> 
> \- i forgot to include how mama taekwoon and mama hakyeon found hongbin (i know i didn't involve hongbin too much pls kill me for this injustice) but he ran away from home, his family was alive when he left, their current status is unknown. hongbin ran away from an abusive father and a mother who had more than one lover. he spent most of his time mugging people while the world fell apart up until he met hakyeon who gave him the scolding of his young life. he stole hakyeon's last stick of lip balm (he thought it was a roll of candy), it was terrifying and taekwoon lists it as #4 of 'hakyeon's most heated moments'. 
> 
> \- wonsik and taekwoon do not have an established relationship, i have them tagged up in the tags because it's heavily suggested that they have very intimate feelings for each other but do not act on it. taekwoon still feels very guilty about wonsik's leg, even though he knows he is not the cause of it and even when he and wonsik talk about it. 
> 
> \- jaehwan and sanghyuk don't have an established relationship either and there's never been a real confession between the two, but they have kissed multiple times and held hands and done ~other~ things too, maybe. whatever your imagination wants, i guess.
> 
> \- the boys found a queen sized mattress in the cottage when they settled in, they later took the bed from the other house (the one where the boy and father lived at, i know it's messed up but they needed it) and jaehwan has always just slept in a sleeping bag on the floor. wonsik later gets the cot, so it becomes hongbin and sanghyuk in one bed, taekwoon and hakyeon in the other. 
> 
> \- i don't know how sanghyuk made a small bear trap with broken parts from a bike and various other things, i just don't know.
> 
> \- i don't even know how a bear even snuck into their house. don't ask me.
> 
> \- hakyeon and taekwoon grew up together and are the only survivors of their families, hakyeon had a crush on joohyun aka seohyun of snsd. joohee and ara are alice and yoo ara of hello venus. the father/son duo are just made up and therefore have no names.
> 
> \- the part where jaehwan is hitting sanghyuk's shoulder, he realizes that sanghyuk both likes him and is also starting fade. 
> 
> \- sanghyuk's ages are 12-19, everyone being their correct age difference from him. 
> 
> \- i am one of those people who spell ravi's birth name as 'wonsik' instead of 'wonshik' i am sorry.
> 
> that's all for notes, i know these are long eep. but thanks for reading!


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